May 24, 2016
Hi! I’m Michael and two weeks ago I stopped taking Adderall. I don’t know if it would make sense for you nor am I here to give medical advice, but I do feel a great burden to share my story with you.
It started in 5th grade… doing poorly in school, disruptive, fidgety, talking in class, terrible focus. Sound familiar? My parents, who are the BEST, of course are concerned and take action. Off to the psychiatrist we go. Surprise surprise, young Michael is showing all the symptoms of ADD and this is where my relationship with Adderall begins. I don’t remember much about that time aside from the fact that grades shot up, focus seemed easier… all good. This continued on until high school, things had improved greatly and lets be honest, what teenager remembers to take prescriptions? I came off.
After my junior year my GPA had taken a hard hit so back to the psychiatrist we went. It was senior year and the papers/exam cram sessions were in full force. The power of Adderall as a study aid came alive. Got a 10 page paper due? Grab an adderall and crank it out the night before. Time for finals? Reach for the pill. This was the routine through college as well. I hesitate to admit it but in time of great “focus need” I would crush them up and snort for instant impact. Now remember this was always my script. Never in interest to abuse or get an “addy hit”, but it helped me right? This pill makes me better. I like it. I feel clearer, sharper, “on my game”.
After college I came off. Spent a few years working odds and ends trying to figure life out and finally found a career I loved. I was about two years in with this company and things just felt “average”. I couldn’t shake this feeling that I was “off my game” and “not quite tapping into my full potential”. So back to the doc I went again. This time was a bit trickier, adult male calling around to ask about adderall prescriptions raised a few flags. After making quite a few calls I finally found a doc who was happy to discuss. We met once, I told her my history, answered a few easy questions and out came the script book. I was excited, really felt like I was turning a corner. The next 2-3 years my production rocketed. I was at the top of my game and LOVING it. Spent a few more years there and then used that momentum to start my own operation a little less than a year ago. You’re probably thinking, “Ok awesome Michael. What’s the problem here?”
30 days ago I had lunch with a dear friend Chris, you can find out more about him here, I left inspired to listen to the Food Revolution Summit (HIGHLY recommend) Long story short, started getting educated on nutrition, how what we eat impacts our brain and began making changes. Eating as clean as possible, check. Finding a Tom’s non-aluminum deodorant that doesn’t leave me smelling like an elephant, check. Then it hit me, 5 days a week i’m willingly ingesting a chemical.
But i’m better with Adderall, right?
I couldn’t have achieved what I had without my addy, right?
I’d be an unmotivated mess if I come off, right?
Well that’s where I am today. I have no magic wand to wave and I ask myself everyday if I should take another adderall, but it’s been two weeks now and i’ve learned a lot. I feel I haven’t even scratched the surface. I’ve got no agenda here, I just want to be clean. Pure mind, pure body, pure soul. Our bodies are temples right?
Does your heart wonder the same? Is there life beyond the pill? I’m diving deep to find answers and i’ll be sharing them here. Let’s explore together.
To your freedom,